Series: The Importance of…
The Importance of Fathers Being Important
INTRO: Today, being Father’s Day is a good day to do two things. I am going to end the Importance of… series, and I am going to spend time dealing with fathers (surprise!). I am going to share several statistics this morning. Understand, these are not meant to hurt or embarrass anyone, especially single mothers. These statistics show the weakness in children’s lives when there is not a father in their lives.
I think God intended for fathers to be involved in their children’s lives – unfortunately that is not the case in too many homes today. Remember these are statistics and this does not mean all children will behave as the statistics show.
Message will not be overly long today, nor do I intend for it to be a beat on dad day. Having said that, I think many of our fathers today are a sorry example for children to copy!
Did you know that over one third of the children in the United States do not have a father who lives in the household? Of those children, one in five have not seen their father in over five years. Not having a father around can affect children in many ways; emotionally, financially and scholastically. Statistics indicate that children from fatherless homes tend to have higher drop out rates, be more likely to engage in substance abuse, have poorer health, experience behavioral problems and live in poverty. This is not a pretty picture, and as a concerned parent, you want to do everything that you can in order to lessen the impact of your child’s father’s absence from the home and lack of involvement in your child’s life.
www.essortment.com
A myriad of maladies. Fatherless children are at a dramatically greater risk of drug and alcohol abuse, mental illness, suicide, poor educational performance, teen pregnancy, and criminality.
Source: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, National Center for Health Statistics, Survey on Child Health, Washington, DC, 1993.
Drug Use: "...the absence of the father in the home affects significantly the behavior of adolescents and results in the greater use of alcohol and marijuana."
Source: Deane Scott Berman, "Risk Factors Leading to Adolescent Substance Abuse," Adolescence 30 (1995)
Psychiatric Problems. In 1988, a study of preschool children admitted to New Orleans hospitals as psychiatric patients over a 34-month period found that nearly 80 percent came from fatherless homes.
Source: Jack Block, et al. "Parental Functioning and the Home Environment in Families of Divorce," Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 27 (1988)
Fatherly influence. Children with fathers at home tend to do better in school, are less prone to depression and are more successful in relationships. Children from one-parent families achieve less and get into trouble more than children from two parent families.
Source: One Parent Families and Their Children: The School's Most Significant Minority, conducted by The Consortium for the Study of School Needs of Children from One Parent Families, co sponsored by the National Association of Elementary School Principals and the Institute for Development of Educational Activities, a division of the Charles F. Kettering Foundation, Arlington, VA., 1980
Violent rejection: Kids who exhibited violent behavior at school were 11 times as likely not to live with their fathers and six times as likely to have parents who were not married. Boys from families with absent fathers are at higher risk for violent behavior than boys from intact families.
Source: J.L. Sheline (et al.), "Risk Factors...", American Journal of Public Health, No. 84. 1994.
Dadless years: About 40 percent of the kids living in fatherless homes haven't seen their dads in a year or more. Of the rest, only one in five sleeps even one night a month at the father's home. And only one in six sees their father once or more per week.
Source: F. Furstenberg, A. Cherlin, Divided Families. Harvard Univ. Press. 1991.
Commercial breaks: The amount of time a father spends with his child -- one-on-one -- averages less than 10 minutes a day.
Source: J. P. Robinson, et al., "The Rhythm of Everyday Life." Westview Press. 1988
Who are you, mister? In 1965, parents on average spent approximately 30 hours a week with their kids. By 1985, the amount of time had fallen to 17 hours.
Source: William Mattox, "The Parent Trap." Policy Review. Winter, 1991.
Father's Day Statistics
1) 43% of US children live without their father [US Department of Census]
2) 90% of homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes. [US D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census]
3) 80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes. [Criminal Justice & Behaviour, Vol 14, pp. 403-26, 1978]
4) 71% of pregnant teenagers lack a father. [U.S. Department of Health and Human Services press release, Friday, March 26, 1999]
5) 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes. [US D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census]
6) 85% of children who exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes. [Center for Disease Control]
7) 90% of adolescent repeat arsonists live with only their mother. [Wray Herbert, “Dousing the Kindlers,” Psychology Today, January, 1985, p. 28]
8) 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. [National Principals Association Report on the State of High Schools]
9) 75% of adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes. [Rainbows f for all God’s Children]
10) 70% of juveniles in state operated institutions have no father. [US Department of Justice, Special Report, Sept. 1988]
11) 85% of youths in prisons grew up in a fatherless home. [Fulton County Georgia jail populations, Texas Department of Corrections, 1992]
12) Fatherless boys and girls are: twice as likely to drop out of high school; twice as likely to end up in jail; four times more likely to need help for emotional or behavioral problems. [US D.H.H.S. news release, March 26, 1999]
www.innocentdads.org/stats.htm
Infamous Fatherless People
BILLY THE KID SADDAM HUSSEIN
SIRHAN SIRHAN ADOLPH HITLER
ROBERT GRAYSMITH (ZODIAC SERIAL KILLER)
…..MARC LEPINE (MASS MURDERER OF 14)
JACK THE RIPPER LEE HARVEY OSWALD
JOHN WILKES BOOTH JEFFREY DAHMER
CHARLES MANSON (CULT LEADER)
"MONSTER" CODY (L.A. CRIPS GANGLORD)
Not just our children, but fathers have a…
1 Timothy 5:8(KJV) 8But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
2 Thessalonians 3:10(KJV) 10For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.
Mark 5:23(NKJV) 23and begged Him earnestly, saying, “My little daughter lies at the point of death. Come and lay Your hands on her, that she may be healed, and she will live.”
This goes to show us that…
Children’s need will motivate even dads
Life is more than just providing and protecting physically needed things.
Fathers need to live so they know…
A life of…
Ephesians 5:25(KJV) 25Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Proverbs 19:18(KJV) 18Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.
1
Kings 9:4-7(NKJV) 4Now if you walk before Me as your father David walked,
in integrity of heart and in uprightness, to do according to all that I have
commanded you, and if you keep My statutes and My judgments,
5then I will establish the throne of your kingdom over Israel forever,
as I promised David your father, saying, ‘You shall not fail to have a man on
the throne of Israel.’
6But if you or your sons at all turn from following Me, and
do not keep My commandments and My statutes which I have set before you,
but go and serve other gods and worship them,
7then I will cut off Israel from the land which I have given them;
and this house which I have consecrated for My name I will cast out of My
sight. Israel will be a proverb and a byword among all peoples.
One area fathers often fall short or forget, is they need to be a…
Encouragement, encouragement, encouragement
Ephesians 6:4(KJV) 4And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Time, time, time
Proverbs 17:6(KJV) 6Children’s children are the crown of old men; and the glory of children are their fathers.
Relationship, relationship, relationship
Deuteronomy 4:9(NKJV) 9Only take heed to yourself, and diligently keep yourself, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren,
Forgiveness, forgiveness, forgiveness
Not only model God’s forgiveness – teach it
Luke 15:20-24(KJV) 20And
he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his
father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed
him.
21And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven,
and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.
22But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe,
and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his
feet:
23And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us
eat, and be merry:
24For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is
found. And they began to be merry.
It cannot be too soon…
Proverbs 22:6(KJV) 6Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Isaiah 28:9(NKJV) 9 “Whom will he teach knowledge? And whom will he make to understand the message? Those just weaned from milk? Those just drawn from the breasts?
Timothy 3:15(KJV) 15And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.
Proverbs 8:17(KJV) 17I love them that love me; and those that seek me early shall find me.
2 Timothy 1:5(NKJV) 5when I call to remembrance the genuine faith that is in you, which dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded is in you also.
As a family…
2 Chronicles 20:13(KJV) 13And all Judah stood before the LORD, with their little ones, their wives, and their children.
I thought as I prepared for this, “What do children need from Dad?”
Is it money? No – well some.
Is it new cars? – No – well according to what color and make – kidding.
Is it fancy clothes? No
Shiny toys? NO!
Children need Dad!
Now what Dad needs is another story altogether.
Dad needs God first, and the ability to show and give his family his love.
Gary Marcum – New Beginnings Church – 062010am