Dealing With Monkeys Of Forgiveness Emotions

Series: I Need Help Getting The Monkey Off My Back

Part 5 - Dealing With Monkeys Of Forgiveness Emotions

Hebrews 12:1 - 3

^{1Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,
^{2Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.
^{3For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds.
INTRO: Have you ever had a problem dealing with something in life that seemed to have control over you? Well I am going to deal with some things that are kind of like a "monkey on your back" kind of thing.
So, today when we hear the term, they have a monkey on their back, they are having a terrible time dealing with an issue, habit, or even a sin in their lives. I want to start a series dealing with some of these things people face in life.
Today I want to continue looking at the Monkey of Strong Emotions. Four weeks ago, I dealt with envy and jealousy. Envy and jealousy are real relationship killers. Two weeks ago we dealt with hateful emotions that Satan uses against all of us at one time or another. Last week, we looked at loneliness. Today, I want to look at forgiveness.
You know we spend our life dealing with forgiveness. As a child, we quickly forgive the things that hurt our feelings when it comes to our parents. Wait a minute, you mean our parents need forgiveness a lot? Yes, at least in our minds they hurt our feelings and do things we become upset about and then, we forgive them. Poof it's gone! That is the way we need to be in life today. Not holding grudges, not dwelling on and tied up in the past, not bitter about something that really does not matter in the realm of eternity. But, we all do at times fail to seek, fail to give and fail to accept forgiveness.
So what is forgiveness? The act of forgiving; pardon.

What are some things God tells us about forgiveness?

It is important in our every day life

Matthew 5:14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.

People are watching how we handle forgiveness

Matthew 5:21 - 24
^{21Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:
^{22But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, RacaRaca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.
^{23Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee;
^{24Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.
Why is forgiveness a problem?

No forgiveness…
No fellowship

Matthew 6:14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:

"Hard" feelings

Mark 11:25 - 26 ²⁵And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.
^{26But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

Mistrust
Avoidance

So how does Satan use forgiveness in our lives to cause us problems?

Cause a continuance of turmoil in our lives

Proverbs 3:3 Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:

A festering of the problem if you would

Proverbs 11:17 The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.

A spreading or sharing of the problem (with others)

Luke 17:4 And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.

Explosiveness (leads to retaliation and retribution)

Proverbs 24:29 Say not, I will do so to him as he hath done to me: I will render to the man according to his work.
So, honestly how does a lack of forgiveness hurt myself and others?

We have a "reason" or "approval" to dislike
Even "justification" to hate
It distances us from God (and each other)
It is a bad mark on the Lord (we are His) in the eyes of others

Exodus 23:4 If thou meet thine enemy’s ox or his ass going astray, thou shalt surely bring it back to him again.

What are the steps for forgiveness?

To obtain:

Recognize wrong committed
Reveal your shortcomings to God then man
Request forgiveness from God and man

To give:

Look for forgiveness opportunity
Offer forgiveness unconditionally
Give forgiveness wholeheartedly

Ephesians 4:32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.
Colossians 3:13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
Matthew 5:7 Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
Romans 12:17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.
What do I do if they want forgive me?

First, make sure you really sought and asked for forgiveness! Not just a cursory request to make someone happy or satisfied.

Then…

Look to God
Let it go
Lay it down
Leave it there
Lay bear for them love and mercy
Live for God

Proverbs 25:21 - 22 ²¹If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink:
^{22For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the LORD shall reward thee.

Luke 6:27 But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you,
Luke 6:35 But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.
Romans 12:17 - 21 ¹⁷Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.
^{18If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.
^{19Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
^{20Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.
^{21Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
Just as a quick guide or look…
Asking for forgiveness

Forgiveness found is truly sweet
Forgiveness brings fellowship
Forgiveness brings peace
Forgiveness amplifies love

Benefit of forgiveness

Forgiveness is godly
Forgiveness is blessed by God
Forgiveness is God's way
Forgiveness is God's example
Forgiveness is God's gift

Cost of forgiveness…

Forgiving even when we don't want to
Forgiving even when we think they are really undeserving
Forgetting our grudge or complaint
Forgoing revenge - even if it IS sweet

Deliverance of real forgiveness

Is life-changing
Is self-healing
Is bigger than the argument
Is right

Gary Marcum - New Beginnings Church - 111107am}}}}}}}}}}}}}