Planning To Be A Perfect Dad

INTRO: Dads often miss the mark. They are too busy in life to spend the time they need with their wife, children, families and friends. Sure they work hard, trying to pay bills, get ahead, do this and do that, but what about taking care of business with their own families?

Just what does it take to be a good dad? A perfect dad? More than we can do? More than we are willing to do? That might be the real question. Today, I want to talk about planning to be a perfect dad. Not just lucking into it. Not just letting it happen, but actually planning and following through on making ourselves into a perfect dad.

Let us read…

Luke 15:11 And he said, A certain man had two sons:

12 And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living.

13 And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

14 And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that land; and he began to be in want.

15 And he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country; and he sent him into his fields to feed swine.

16 And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him.

17 And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father's have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger!

18 I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee,

19 And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.

20 And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.

21 And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.

22 But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet:

23 And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry:

24 For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.

25 Now his elder son was in the field: and as he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard music and dancing.

26 And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant.

27 And he said unto him, Thy brother is come; and thy father hath killed the fatted calf, because he hath received him safe and sound.

28 And he was angry, and would not go in: therefore came his father out, and entreated him.

29 And he answering said to his father, Lo, these many years do I serve thee, neither transgressed I at any time thy commandment: and yet thou never gavest me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends:

30 But as soon as this thy son was come, which hath devoured thy living with harlots, thou hast killed for him the fatted calf.

31 And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.

32 It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found.

 

Men need to understand their role in life, this should cause them to…

We are often considered the Providers in life, so we need to…

Pray for life's needs (not just successes)

Pray…

About your children/family/friends/self

For your children

In front of your children

With your children

We are often so busy fulfilling our roles, we forget what it is like to be a child, we need to remember this and…

Play the nice guy - we often relish the "tough guy image"

Lighten up - don't be so serious that you scare your children, preventing them from being a child

Lessen stress for everyone around you

Enjoy life - "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy." Which means, it makes him no fun for his children to be around (or his wife, friends, co-workers, etc.)

Paint a picture of a loving father in your children's eyes

Fathers should be willing to…

Pay your share

I know we are asked to ante up all the time, but you should pay…

Attention to your wife

Attention to your children

Attention to your family

Pay complements

Pay an allowance for their learning

Pay rewards when due

Eph. 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

2 Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise;

3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.

4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Col. 3: 21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

1 Jn. 2:1 My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous:

2 And he is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world.

3 And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments.

4 He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.

5 But whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected: hereby know we that we are in him.

6 He that saith he abideth in him ought himself also so to walk, even as he walked.

7 Brethren, I write no new commandment unto you, but an old commandment which ye had from the beginning. The old commandment is the word which ye have heard from the beginning.

8 Again, a new commandment I write unto you, which thing is true in him and in you: because the darkness is past, and the true light now shineth.

9 He that saith he is in the light, and hateth his brother, is in darkness even until now.

10 He that loveth his brother abideth in the light, and there is none occasion of stumbling in him.

11 But he that hateth his brother is in darkness, and walketh in darkness, and knoweth not whither he goeth, because that darkness hath blinded his eyes.

12 I write unto you, little children, because your sins are forgiven you for his name's sake.

13 I write unto you, fathers, because ye have known him that is from the beginning. I write unto you, young men, because ye have overcome the wicked one. I write unto you, little children, because ye have known the Father.

14 I have written unto you, fathers, because ye have known him that is from the beginning. I have written unto you, young men, because ye are strong, and the word of God abideth in you, and ye have overcome the wicked one.

15 Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

While we often hesitate, fathers truly need to…

Preach to your children

Righteous (His, not yours)

Truth

Consistency

Holiness

Grace

Forgiveness

Patience

Health

(but,) Not in excess

Not as one perfect

The real reason to preach is…

So you can practice

Which brings me to my last point, fathers need to…

Practice living in their sight - or, better yet - practice what you preach (all those I mentioned earlier and more)

Fun

Friendship

Future building (their lives are worth it)

Forgiveness

Failure - help your children not be afraid to try and fail

 

Gary Marcum - New Beginnings Church - 061503